


First Storms

by BroadwayItBitch



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Anxiety, If You Squint - Freeform, M/M, New School, Not Canon Compliant, Panic Attacks, Stephen King References, connor and zoe are twins, still kinda canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-28
Updated: 2018-12-28
Packaged: 2019-09-29 02:51:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17195111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BroadwayItBitch/pseuds/BroadwayItBitch
Summary: Connor Murphy is a new student at an Illinois high school, and meets fellow student named Evan Hansen for an English project. Connor's first friend in awhile





	First Storms

**Author's Note:**

> sry if it's bad
> 
> TW: panic attack. not too graphic, warning is just in case.
> 
> I may add, I'm not good at writing emotional scenes, and I don't want to trigger anyone at all, so I try not to make them too graphic.

Connor walked into his new school with his head hanging low. Larry got another job opportunity in Illinois and they all had to pack up and move within a month. Connor didn’t have to say goodbye to his friends, because he didn’t have any.

 

But he was hoping his first day at his new school will be okay. At least enough to get caught up.

 

Zoe left him a while ago with another group of girls. Seems that she has some new friends already.

 

Connor looked at his schedule. He already went through his first 2 classes. His next class was English, which he was not looking forward to.

 

He walks into the classroom. Everyone is sitting in their seats and the teacher was writing the day’s plan on the board.

 

“Ah, I see, you’re our new student,” The teacher, Ms. Jacobs says, walking over to Connor. “Connor Murphy, yes?”

 

He nods shyly.

 

“Well, I’ll have you sit next to Evan Hansen, he’s the one in the upper right desk,” She points to a blond haired boy in a front row table with an empty seat next to him.

 

“Thanks,” Connor quietly says, walking over to the seat and sitting next to Evan. “Hi.”

 

Evan shyly ducks his head.

 

Connor looks at the boy confused, but turns back to Ms. Jacobs.

 

“Okay, our next project will be a presentation on a famed author, poet, writer, etcetera. Your partner will be your tablemate. I will give you a topic.”

 

Connor looks over to Evan, who is looking at Ms. Jacobs with wide eyes.

 

Evan’s fists tighten and they start shaking.

 

Evan takes a few deep breaths, calming down a bit.

 

“Evan and Connor, you’ll be doing Stephen King,” Ms. Jacobs brings Connor out of his concerned state. It seems that they were the last group to be assigned. “The remainder of the period will be researching about your topic.”

 

“Um… are you okay?” Connor asks Evan.

 

“Yeah, I-I’m okay,” He assures.

 

Connor opened his chromebook to look up his topic, while Evan sat there taking notes.

 

\--------------------

 

It was lunchtime now. This school has 4 lunch periods, one for each grade. Connor grabbed his lunch tray when he looked for a place to sit.

 

Almost everyone was laughing about the classes they had or some shit. He couldn’t barge into their conversation.

 

He saw Zoe with her new friends. Looks like she’s having fun.

 

Connor then laid his eyes on Evan. The poor boy was sitting alone and didn’t have his own tray of lunch. Connor walks over to the table.

 

“This seat taken?” He asks and Evan looks up to him.

 

“Uh… N-no?” Evan replies and Connor sits across from him. “Y-you don’t h-h-have to sit with me.”

 

Connor smiles. “I want to. You seem cool.”

 

Evan blushes.

 

“Tell me something about yourself,” Connor tries.

 

“Well, um, I like trees and um… I-I-I like to write,” Evan stutters.

 

“Trees? Never heard that one before,” Connor says with a smirk.

 

Evan becomes an anxious mess. “I-I know, it’s s-stupid, but they’re really cool, or maybe not, I just find them interesting,” He rambles.

 

Connor laughs. “You’re rambling.”

 

Evan stops talking and ducks his head in shame.

 

“Hey, it’s okay. It’s kinda cute when you ramble,” Connor says and Evan blushes again. “I couldn’t impose, but would it be okay if I come over to work on our project?”

 

Evan shrugs. “I dunno, my mom’s working and then she has night school.”

 

Connor takes out his phone. “Gimme your phone,” He says and the anxious boy takes out his phone and they exchange them. “Put your number in my contacts.”

 

Evan’s shaking hands types in the numbers and they exchange the phones again.

 

“Text you after school?” Connor offers, and Evan meekly nods. “Cool, so tell me more about yourself.”

 

\--------------------

 

After school, Connor was glad to be let out. He didn’t mind the school day. He made a friend. Zoe catches up with him outside.

 

“Hey,” She says. “Good day?”

 

Connor nodded. “Yeah, I think so.”

 

Zoe smiles.

 

“Tell Mom and Dad that I won’t be there for dinner. I have to work on a project.”

 

Zoe bids him goodbye and she walks to her car (well, it was her and Connor’s). Connor feels a buzz on his left thigh and he takes out his phone. There was a text from Evan.

 

**Evan: Hey, it’s Evan. Will you be walking or taking the bus or driving to my place?**

 

Connor smiles, quickly typing out a response.

 

**Connor: I’ll be walking.**

****Evan: K. My address is 173 Appletree avenue. The house is red.** **

******Connor: Thx.** ** **

 

Connor pockets his phone, disembarking on his walk to Evan’s.

 

\--------------------

 

Evan pulled out some snacks for Connor. He didn’t know what he liked. He had carrots and chips and dip. What if he didn’t like chips? What if there was ingredient in the dip that Connor was allergic to? Wait, no, take a breath.

 

He hears a knock on the door. Connor’s here. Fuck. Evan walks over to the door and opens it.

 

“Hey,” Connor says with a smile.

 

“H-hi,” Evan replies with a stutter.

 

Connor looks over Evan’s shoulder to see the snack set up.

 

“So, you gonna let me in or what?”

 

Evan seems to come back to reality, moving out of the way to let Connor in.

 

Connor looks around the house. The place looks like it was warm and loving, albeit a little cluttered.

 

“Nice place,” Connor compliments. “Cozy.”

 

Evan shrugs, moving some shoes out of the way. “I-it’s not m-much.”

 

Connor walks into the living room, setting his bag on the floor.

 

“I hope you like the s-snacks, if not, that’s okay, I didn’t know what you liked,” Evan rambles again.

 

“It’s okay. I happen to love carrots.”

 

Connor pulls out his chromebook, opens it and faces it towards Evan.

 

“So we need to list his first work, most famous ones and the latest work. As well as his influences to do them.”

 

Evan takes out a notebook and starts writing down what Connor is typing in.

 

“So where’d you live before Illinois?” Evan asks when Connor stuffs a carrot in his mouth.

 

Connor swallows the food. “I lived in Wisconsin. It was good, and there was a cheese store in Tomah. But I ended up getting digestive issues, so,” He chuckles. “My dad got another job here, and made us all leave on such short notice.”

 

Evan feels like his heart will explode, he’s never felt this way before.

 

“Do you have any siblings?” Connor asks.

 

“N-no. Well, not exactly. They’re my half-siblings in Colorado, we sh-share the same dad.”

 

Connor’s mouth forms an O shape and he nods his head.

 

“I have a twin sister, and she’s kind of an ass, but she means well. She hogs our bathroom, though,” This makes Evan laugh. “Her name’s Zoe, and she’s probably my best friend in my family.”

 

He didn’t mention that the previous year, he went into a bad state of depression. He started fights with his family. While he didn’t start most of them, he did start some. He even was estranged from his sister. This conversation was for another day.

 

“Wh-what about your parents? What’re th-they l-l-like?” Evan asks.

 

“My parents are… okay, I guess. My dad’s an ass. And not in the Zoe type. He’s totally in denial that I have mental issues,” Connor shrugs. “And my mom, all she cares about is if she has the perfect family. She cares about the image, cares about the stereotypical nuclear family.”

 

Evan seemed like he understood. His dad only cared about that, too.

 

“But, I love them, they’re my parents, y’know?” The smaller boy nods. “But enough about me, what about your parents?”

 

“Uh… well, uh, my mom is a n-nurse’s aide. Works overnights most of the time,” Evan says, setting down his notebook. “And she’s taking night classes.”

 

Connor smiles. “What’s she studying?”

 

“Law. Uh, paralegal,” Evan replies.

 

“Cool,” Connor says. “Your mom seems nice.”

 

Heidi is like any mom. Wanting the best for her son. But it’s been tough now she’s taking more hours.

 

“Yeah, she loves me and I love her.”

 

Connor secretly wishes that he had Evan’s mom.

 

“So, back to work?” Connor offers and Evan nods, grabbing the notebook again.

 

\--------------------

 

Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God. Evan’s heart was pounding, felt as if it were going to burst out of his chest. It was presentation day and Ms. Jacobs knew he had severe anxiety with this sort of thing.

 

“Dude, we’re gonna be fine,” Connor says as they were finishing up the Google Slides. “We’ve practiced for weeks.”

 

Evan tried to think happy thoughts, but he can’t seem to get the anxieties out.

 

“Okay, Connor and Evan, we’re ready.”

 

Connor and Evan stand from their seats with their notes in hand.

 

“Our project is on Stephen King. He was born in Portland, Maine on September twenty-first, 1947,” Connor starts. “His first novel was _Carrie_ and he almost didn’t finish it until his wife encouraged him to finish. Some of his more popular books are _It_ , _Elevation_ and _The Shining_.”

 

Evan’s shaking hands pulls the card up.

 

“St-Stephen K-King was i-influenced…” Evan froze. Everything went blurry in his vision. His heartbeat quickened. He could hear his breathing.

 

Evan ran out, dropping the cards. Connor follows after a few minutes.

 

“Ev? Evan?” Connor calls out. He goes into the nearest bathroom and starts hearing whimpers and sniffling. “Ev?”

 

The whimpering increases.

 

Connor moves closer to the source of the noise, to the farthest stall.

 

“Can I come in?” He asks and he pushes the door open.

 

Evan was sitting on the ground, rocking back and forth.

 

Connor leans down, taking Evan into his arms.

 

“Shh… shh…I got you,” Evan cries louder. “Hey, look at me.”

 

Evan obeys.

 

“I need you to breathe with me. In,” Connor inhales. “And out,” he exhales.

 

They do this for awhile, and Evan’s breathing starts to subside, but his tears still flowed.

 

“I-I-I’m s-sorry,” Evan sobs. “I p-probably messed u-up our p-p-project.”

 

Connor hugs the crying boy closer. “No, no. You didn’t mess anything up. You were overwhelmed and I get it,” He comforts. “But I’m proud that you tried.”

 

Evan presses his face into the nape of Connor’s neck.

 

“You gonna be okay?” Connor asks and Evan shakes his head no. “Do you want me to call your mom?”

 

Evan shakes his head again.

 

“Let’s get the fuck out of here,” Connor says. He helps Evan stand up, almost losing his balance.

 

Once he helps Evan outside, they find Connor’s car.

 

“I-I wanna go home,” Evan says.

 

“Okay, I’ll get you home,” Connor replies, opening the passenger side door and helping Evan into the seat. He closes the door and goes to his side of the car.

 

Connor takes out his phone.

 

**Connor: Zo, I need the car, I’m sorry I couldn’t let you know in time, are you able to get home safe?**

 

There was a response within a minute.

 

**Zoe: K, thanks for letting me know. I’m spending the night with Alana, so I’ll be fine.**

 

Connor puts his phone back in his pocket and takes out his set of keys. He puts them in the ignition and turns on the car.

 

Evan whimpers suddenly and Connor turns his head.

 

“What is it?” Connor asks.

 

“No-nothing, I just need someone t-to hold my hand,” Evan regrets this request. “Unless that’s t-too w-w-weird, I u-understand-”

 

Evan’s sentence is interrupted when Connor grabs his hand and rests it on his thigh.

 

“It’s not weird, Ev. If you need me to hold your hand for anything, I will.”

 

They spend the rest of the ride in silence, but Evan was grateful that Connor was there.

 

\--------------------

 

When they got home, Connor was still holding his friend’s hand. They only stopped when they were getting out of the car. Once inside, Evan slumps on the couch.

 

“You look like you need a nap,” Connor comments.

Evan gets up from the couch and climbs the stairs to his room, in which Connor follows.

 

When Connor reaches Evan’s room, he notices some things in there. There are little potted plants on the desk, nightstand, dresser and windowsill.

 

Evan was snug in his bed, but something still bothered him.

 

“C-can you lay with me?”

 

Connor smiles, lying next to Evan. He starts spooning the smaller boy.

 

“This okay?” Evan nods and Connor cuddles closer to him. “No need to worry.”

 

Evan flips over to face Connor. They’ve never faced this close before.

 

“Thank you. For everything,” Evan says.

 

“You’re welcome,” Connor smiles.

 

Evan moves closer and Connor can feel the ghost of his breath.

 

Connor surges forward, attaching their lips. Evan’s eyes widen, but they close soon after. Connor’s soft lips contrasted with Evan’s dehydrated, chapped ones. Once they part, Evan rests his forehead against Connor’s.

 

“Rest, love, I’ll be here when you wake up,” Connor says and Evan closes his eyes. His breathing evens out.

 

And when Evan woke up, Connor kept his promise.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! I'm trying to see if I can't get Beyond: Two Souls done before New Years, I'm just not getting a lot of motivation. I want to thank you all for being so patient with it so far, I am about halfway through and I may clear my schedule the next few days to get it done.
> 
> Love, Abbey Elizabeth.


End file.
